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Mr Irrelevant
 Post subject: The Verdict
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 3:30 pm 
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Mr Sarf, you have been found not guilty of being a bounder but guilty of being a witch. You pleaded guilty to being a loid.

However the charge brought was that you were all three so having been found not guilty of the charge of cnutism you are by definition not guilty of all charges. That being so you shall not be deleted.

However, it is clear that you are a witch and shall be burned at the stake at the first opportunity.

Do you have anything to say in your defence before matches are ignited?
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Salty
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 3:36 pm 
wouldn't hanging be better?? :wink:
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the antitheist
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 3:56 pm 
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Posts: 243
I thought witches were drowned
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Mr Irrelevant
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 3:57 pm 
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How can you drown a witch? They're made of wood.
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Moriarty
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 4:11 pm 
Your poll shows that i'm NOT guilty of being a witch

Is there something dodgy going on here?
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Moriarty
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 4:14 pm 
Are you two haughton and sotnick by any chance?
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poolpower
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 4:15 pm 
you have been on the board two days and you have to ask that


burn him
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Mister Ed
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 4:19 pm 
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Joined: Mon Aug 21, 2006 1:07 pm
Posts: 1664
Location: it feels like my birthday
I'm here have I missed much?

has the burning started?

there are lots of halloween things appenning on the 28th apparently..

according to witches weekly!

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TheGingerPoolie
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 4:19 pm 
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Joined: Sat Aug 19, 2006 6:01 pm
Posts: 2038
Location: Leeds
Mr ADG wrote:
AND THEN THIS HAPPENED.

Salty: We have found a witch. May we burn him?

Bunker: Burn him! Burn! Burn him! Burn him!

Mr I: How do you know he is a witch?

Mr Ed: He looks like one.

Bunker: Right! Yeah! Yeah!

Mr I: Bring him forward.

Sarf: I'm not a witch. I'm not a witch.

Mr I: Uh, but you are dressed as one.

Sarf: They dressed me up like this.

Bunker: Augh, we didn't! We didn't...

Sarf: And this isn't my nose. It's a false one.

Mr I: Well?

Salty: Well, we did do the nose.

Mr I: The nose?

Salty: And the hat, but he is a witch!

Mr Ed: Yeah!

Bunker: We burn him! Right! Yeaaah! Yeaah!

Mr I: Did you dress him up like this?

Salty: No!

Mr Ed and Fens: No. No.

Mr Ed: No.

Salty: No.

Mr Ed and Fens: No.

Salty: Yes.

Mr Ed: Yes.

Salty: Yes. Yeah, a bit.

Fens: A bit.

Salty & Mr ed: A bit.

Fens: A bit.

Salty: He has got a wart.

RANDOM: [cough]

Mr I: What makes you think he is a witch?

Fens: Well, he turned me into a newt.

Mr I: A newt?

Fens: I got better.

Mr Ed: Burn him anyway!

Salty: Burn!

Bunker: Burn him! Burn! Burn him!..
.
Mr I: Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! Quiet! There are ways of telling whether he is a
witch.

Salty: Are there?

Mr Ed: Ah?

Salty: What are they?

Bunker: Tell us! Tell us!...

Mr I: Tell me. What do you
do with witches?

Mr Ed: Burn!

Salty: Burn!
Bunker: Burn! Burn them up! Burn!...

Mr I: And what do you burn apart from witches?

Salty: More witches!

Fens: Shh!

Mr Ed: Wood!

Mr I: So, why do witches burn?
[pause]

Fens: B--... 'cause they're made of... wood?

Mr I: Good! Heh heh.

Bunker: Oh, yeah. Oh.

Mr I: So, how do we tell whether he is made of wood?

Salty: Build a bridge out of him.

Mr I: Ah, but can you not also make bridges out of stone?

Salty: Oh, yeah.

RANDOM: Oh, yeah. True. Uhh...

Mr I: Does wood sink in water?

Salty: No. No
.
Mr Ed: No, it floats! It floats!

Salty: Throw him into the pond!

Bunker: The pond! Throw him into the pond!

Mr I: What also floats in water?

Salty: Bread!

Mr Ed: Apples!

Fens: Uh, very small rocks!

Salty: Cider!

Mr Ed: Uh, gra-- gravy!

Salty: Cherries!

Mr Ed: Mud!

Fens: Uh, churches! Churches!

Mr Ed: Lead! Lead!

Richard Head: A duck!

Bunker: Oooh.

Mr I: Exactly. So, logically...

Salty: If... he... weighs... the same as a duck,... he's made of wood.

Mr I: And therefore?

Mr Ed: A witch!

Salty: A witch!

Bunker: A witch! A witch!...

Catweasle: Here is a duck. Use this duck.
[quack quack quack]

Mr I: Very good. We shall use my largest scales.

Bunker: Ohh! Ohh! Burn the witch! Burn the witch! Burn him! Burn him!
Burn him! Burn him! Burn him! Burn him! Burn him! Ahh! Ahh...

Mr I: Right. Remove the supports!

[whop]
[clunk]
[creak]
Bunker: A witch! A witch! A witch!

Sarf: It's a fair cop.

Fens: Burn him!

Bunker: Burn him! Burn him! Burn him! Burn! Burn!...


Bunker: We lost interest after the first line.


:laugh:
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Snowy
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 4:39 pm 
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Joined: Fri Aug 18, 2006 12:18 pm
Posts: 41279
Is he appealing......? i'll take the case.
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Mister Ed
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 4:57 pm 
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Joined: Mon Aug 21, 2006 1:07 pm
Posts: 1664
Location: it feels like my birthday
Snowy wrote:
Is he appealing......? i'll take the case.


has a cute smile apparently.....if u like tthat sort of thing....

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Moriarty
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 5:55 pm 
Snowy wrote:
Is he appealing......? i'll take the case.


I'll bend over now then shall I?
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Snowy
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 5:59 pm 
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Joined: Fri Aug 18, 2006 12:18 pm
Posts: 41279
sarf wrote:
Snowy wrote:
Is he appealing......? i'll take the case.


I'll bend over now then shall I?
I would remind the defendant that he is not at the carvery at Echo Valley or Mr Atweasles 'Dungeon of Delights ...I want cash!! :wink:
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