Joined: Wed Aug 29, 2007 4:59 pm
Posts: 6944
Location: up jacks arse in america.
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15 Degrees. Southerners turn on their heating. Geordies plant their gardens.
10 Degrees. Southerners shiver uncontrollably. Geordies Sunbathe.
5 Degrees. Southern cars will not start. Geordies drive with their windows down
0 Degrees. Southerners wear coats, gloves, and wool hats. Geordies throw a t-shirt on (Girls start wearing mini-skirts)
-5 Degrees. Southerners begin to Evacuate. Geordies go swimming in the North Sea.
-10 degrees. Southern landlords turn up the heat. Geordies have the last barbecue before it gets cold.
-15 Degrees. Southerners cease to exist. Geordies throw on a lightweight jacket.
-20 Degrees. Polar bears wonder if it's worth it. Geordie Boy scouts start wearing long trousers.
-25 Degrees. Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Geordies put on their long johns.
-30 Degrees. Alcohol freezes. Geordies become frustrated because the pubs are shut.
-35 Degrees. Microbiological life starts to disappear. The cows on Newcastle town moor complain of vets with cold hands.
-40 Degrees. All atomic motion stops. Geordies start to stamp their feet and blow on their hands.
-50 Degrees. Hell freezes over..........Newcastle United win a trophy
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Low, lie the fields of Athenry,
Where once we watched the small free birds fly.
Our love was on the wind*,
We had dreams and songs to sing.
It's so lonely 'round the Fields of Athenry.
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